The phrase “don’t burn any bridges” has been swirling around my beleaguered brain for months.
It started last year when I left a big software job that quietly ground me down. A soft but nefarious push—one day in the office became three. Optional became mandatory. HR gave me the cold shoulder. My line manager gaslit me with a corporate smile. The company that preached “being human” had no humanity left in it.
And still, I heard the unsolicited advice: “Don’t burn any bridges.”
Honestly? Maybe it’s time we light some of that shit on fire.
❓ Who benefits from keeping every bridge intact?
Not you. It benefits:
The boss who slyly pushed you out
The family member who gets a pass because ‘that’s just how they are’
The friend who only shows up when they need something
The ex you’re still ‘friends’ with because it’s the nice thing to do, even though it eats you up inside
Keeping toxic connections alive to stay “polite” doesn’t make you strong. It makes you a container for someone else’s unresolved mess.
🔥 Bridges that need to burn
Not all endings are failures. Some are the result of boundaries finally being enforced.
I’m not an expert in any way. But here’s what I propose is flammable:
The job/boss that harmed your mental health
The mentor who bailed when you set boundaries
The colleague who “jokes” at your expense
The family tie you keep feeding, but it never feeds you back
Burning these bridges isn’t necessarily revenge; it’s relief. It’s reclaiming and protecting your peace. It’s them no longer enjoying access to you and your energy.
🛠️ Bridges worth rebuilding
Some connections are more than their worst moment. Some are worth the work it takes to rebuild things. Rebuild if:
There’s real accountability
You both want to reconnect, not just “move on”
The damage came from confusion, not cruelty
The foundation is built on care
Not every crack means collapse, but not every collapse deserves repair.
💬 Food for thought
Burning bridges doesn’t make you unprofessional, no matter what your colleagues or parents might say. It makes things clear.
Clear about your limits.
Clear about your worth.
Clear about what you won’t shoulder anymore.
Let it burn when it hurts you. Rebuild where it really matters. Either way, the power is yours to grab hold of.
🔁 Your turn
Think of one bridge in your life. Are you keeping it for the wrong reasons? Is there something in it still worth recovering?
Hit reply and tell me what came up for you, or keep the thought with you and journal about it later on. Give yourself time to reflect.
I have a step mom since I was 3, nothing really good has come from the relationship, my dad passed long ago. I dont know why i feel so guilty about this rickity ol' bridge! Thank you for sharing. I also love the NEON!
A bridge is more about your own life journey than the other people you’ve encountered in that journey. It’s worth burning a bridge if you know absolutely for sure that your life journey will never lead you back to cross over it again. But who can know what the future holds? None of us can know.